Healing as Experimental

Healing is experimental. We cannot perfect it and there isn’t one “right” way to approach it. Instead, it takes curiosity and vulnerability to self-witness. For many of us, therapy is just one way we practice self-reflection. It’s in this space we attempt to make meaning of our behavioral and relational patterns, then and now.

What we discover will often task us to sit with discomfort and at times disappointment. How can we do so without the added layer of shame? How do we practice acceptance without self-blame? And eventually, with this new wisdom and awareness, how do we motivate ourselves to engage differently? 

First, we must give ourselves permission to attempt and “start over” again and again. Therapy is a place to explore and come up with a “game plan.” You will attempt new patterns— your communication, decision-making and perspectives will shift. You’ll be trying on new ways of being amidst your ever-changing context, so don’t expect perfection. Instead, meet yourself with self-compassion. 

That can sound like:

“I cannot perfect my healing journey but I can prioritize it”

“I trust myself to try again”

“I can make different choices today”

“I am fine/OK the way I am”

“I can learn from this”

When we meet ourselves with self-compassion, we give ourselves room to grow. We can try and try again, implementing new lessons and tools, as we walk this healing journey.